Troubled
by NemKess
Summary: warnings: suicide themes, shonen ai. Is Jinpachi's nightmare just the product of a guilty mind? or is it something more sinister?


Title: Troubled  
Author/pseudonym: NemKess  
Fandom: Please Save My Earth  
Pairing: Jinpachi/Issei  
Rating: PG13  
Status: sequel to 'Tired'   
E-mail address for feedback:: nemsmuses@msn.com  
  


Disclaimers: Please Save My Earth belong to me? I could only wish. Nope, not mine. No copyright infringement is intended and no money is made. This is purely to silence the voices in my head. ^_^

  
Notes: I can not stand Jinpachi. He drives me absolutely batty- worse even than Ryo in FAKE!!! Still.. He's the one Issei wants and the demure telepath is my favorite character so either he gets him, or Jinpachi suffers the consequences. ^_^ Also, this is anime based, as I've only seen bits and pieces of the Manga. 

  
Summary: A nightmare troubles Jinpachi. Could it be a warning? Or just a product of his own guilty mind...   
Warnings: shonen ai/yaoi, suicide themes

Previously....

_In a darkened bedroom in a large home on the outskirts of Tokyo, a young man woke from his dream with a violent start. Sweat dripped off his face and the fear and sense of loss was a physical ache._

_His lips still tingled with the feel of a dream-kiss._

_Alone in the dark, he huddled in on himself trying to stave off the dread that had taken up residence in his chest. A single word, a name, escaped his lips. Spoken in a hushed, broken whisper._

_"Issei."_

~*~*~

Badly shaken from his nightmare, Ogura Jinpachi got out of bed and went to fix himself a cut of tea. A glance at the clock showed that it was barely 4a.m., but despite the early hour, he knew he'd never get back to sleep.

In the kitchen, he put water on to boil and sat down.

The dream had seemed so real. Almost as if he'd really been standing on the riverbank listening to Issei pour his heart out.

He knew the empath had the power to share dreams with him. When they were still in high school, those dreams had always been memories of Enju and Gyokuran. Lately though, he'd been getting drawn into more private fantasies that he knew his friend hadn't meant to share.

Just days ago, he'd been pulled into one where they'd made love. Them. Nagarashi Issei and Ogura Jinpachi. Not Enju and Gyokuran.

And once there, he'd ended up swept away in the empath's uncontrolled emotions, unable to get out of the dream and unable to stop it's course.

He'd made love to Issei. He'd had sex with his very male, if somewhat feminine best friend.

And he'd loved every minute of it.

Jinpachi honestly wasn't sure if his disgust the next day had been at Issei for having the fantasies or at himself for enjoying it so much.

Either way, he knew that his reaction had been felt and had hurt the other man deeply.

So... Was the dream Issei's or just a product over his own guilty mind?

The whistling of the tea kettle startled him. With shaking hands, he carefully filled his cup and dropped the tea ball into it, dipping in and out in a repetitive motion that was usually soothing. It wasn't working at the moment though.

He couldn't forget Issei's eyes. The look in them.

No one had ever looked at him with such love. At the same time, there was a world weariness there that made his breath catch to remember. His best friend had seemed ready to end it all.

Pushing the thought away, he frowned and shook his head. 

"No way," he muttered. "Issei's way too strong to do that. Not to mention too smart."

_ What's the point?_ The phantom voice whispered through his mind. _I'm so tired, Jinpachi_....

It had to be a dream. Nagarashi Issei would never do that to him. The dream was right about one thing, they'd been best friends forever. The thing with the bullies had happened in second grade or so. Later, the smaller boys father had done what he could to teach his son self-defense and Jinpachi's protection hadn't been needed by the time they were in junior high.

Not that it had stopped him from trying. He'd taken his vow to protect his friend very seriously.

_You, Jinpachi, were always the only one who could ever really hurt me_...

He swirled the small ball around in the tea absently as he thought about it. He certainly felt bad enough about hurting Issei's feelings over the sex thing to have bad dreams, but he didn't think he'd have ever considered that he had such power over his friend.

Did that mean the dream originated from the empath, then?

It hadn't felt like their previous shared dreams. But neither had it felt like his own. 

It crossed his mind to wonder if Rin was messing with him again, but he shrugged the thought off before it could fully form. The habit of blaming the brat for everything was a hard one to break, but he knew that Alice had better control over him than that these days.

With a sigh, Jinpachi went to grab his phone. Obviously he wasn't going to feel better until he'd spoken with Issei directly and knew he was okay and not planning to do something stupid. 

'_We're sorry. The number you have dialed is no longer in service. Please check the number and dial again_.'

"What the-" With a frown Jinpachi redialed the number, carefully making sure he got each and every one right. Issei'd had the same cell number since he'd gotten the phone as a birthday/going-to-high-school present and he'd certainly called it more than enough to memorize the numbers. 

'_We're sorry. The number you have dialed is no longer in service. Please check the number and dial again_.'

His unease was growing as the recording was repeated. A quick glance at the clock proved that it still wasn't 5 yet. Issei's parents would kill him if he called this early in the morning just to find out what happened to the other young man's cell phone. It wouldn't be so bad if his friend still lived at home. The empath could have smoothed things over easily, but Issei had moved into a college dorm just a few short months before.

Dark eyes brightened. He'd just go over to Issei's dorm room and see him.

Then there'd be no need to wake anyone else up and he'd be doubly assured that his friend was okay. 

Maybe they could even talk, really talk, about what had happened. He missed the friendship that they'd once shared. He missed the days where they'd talk late into the night on the phone or stay over at each other's houses and Issei's voice was the last one he heard before he went to bed.

His first and last thought of any day had always been of Issei. 

Until Mokuran.

"Alice. I meant, Alice." he whispered with a grimace as he pulled on some clothes. Of all the former moon scientists, he suspected that he was the only one who really confused past and present personalities. Especially after all this time.

At the front door, he stopped long enough to scrawl out a note to his mother before grabbing a jacket, slipping on his shoes, and rushing out into the chilly morning air.

It was difficult to keep his mind on his driving as he sped towards the Issei's university. Early as it was, the morning commute hadn't started yet and traffic was almost non-existent.

_ What's the point?_

Why did his mind keep going back to that? To the look on Dream Issei's face while he'd said it?

The depth of despair had been unfathomable. 

Could his mind really have made that up on it's own? Somehow he doubted it, which made his worry for his friend worse than it already was. 

That kind of despair could drive a man insane. 

His doubled sense of urgency had him urging his car to faster speeds than were necessarily safe, but he paid no heed. 

He had to get to Issei. 

He had to see that the other young man was all right.

The trip to the University was far shorter than it had ever been before, but somehow, it seemed to be the longest trip Jinpachi had ever made.

Pulling up to the main dorm building, he stopped short when the realization hit him.

He had no idea what room, or even what building, Issei had been assigned. There was a sick feeling at the knowledge that he and the boy he'd been so close to had grown far enough apart that he didn't know where he lived. He hadn't even realized it.

Had Issei told him, and he'd just forgotten? Or had the empath held the knowledge back for some reason?

He didn't know.

Either way, he knew the distance between them was his own fault.

"I'm sorry," he apologized aloud, even knowing that it would go unheard by the one it was meant for. 

Left with a dilemma, he quickly considered everyone that might know the building and room number. Sakura was the obvious choice, but he didn't know her number. Same problem with Hiiragi. 

Haruhiko had been in and out of the hospital the past year and half the time he was too sedated to remember his own name, either of them, never mind anything else.

Rin or Alice might know, but he damned sure was calling the brat and he didn't want to get Alice in trouble.

The blonde stood there, indecisive, for a long moment before his worry for Issei overrode his consideration for Alice. While waiting for someone to pick up, he took a moment to feel ashamed that Alice's home number was on his speed dial while he apparently didn't even know Issei's anymore.

"Eh... Moshi, Moshi?" 

He was thankful that the sleepy voice belonged to the quiet girl and not her parents. "Um.. Alice? I hate to call so early but it's sort of an emergency."

"Jinpachi-kun? Why are you calling at" yawn "5 in the morning?"

"I need to know if you know what Issei's dorm and room number are. It's really important, Alice."

That seemed to wake her up fully. "Issei? What's wrong? Has something happened?"

"Alice. I don't know yet, that's why I need his room number, so I can go check on him."

There was the sound of rustling papers from the other side of the connection and he could hear the woman muttering to herself as she looked for the information. A muffled 'ah ha!' and then she was back. "It's building 23, room 2318."

"Okay, thanks!"

"Hey! You'll call me back to let me know if he's all right, won't you?"

"Of course! Ja!"

Without waiting for her response, he searched the buildings around him, looking for the right one. 

Each minute it took, he could feel the pressure building in his chest.

He could almost hear the wind whispering to him. '_Danger, danger!_ _Hurry, hurry_!' Which was silly, of course. His psychic powers didn't lend themselves to understand the wind.

"I didn't think you'd be able to find it on your own."

The voice, right beside his ear, startled him enough to make him lose his footing. He landed on the ground with a whimper as pain flashed through his abused tailbone. 

Jinpachi glared up at the newcomer, floating just above him. "Dammit, Rin. Don't do that to people."

The teenager just shrugged unapologetically. "Alice was concerned enough to come over, wake me up, and send me after you. If you're as worried as you made her believe, do you really want to waste time out here yelling at me?"

The brat had a point, as much as he hated to agree with anything Shion/Rin had to say.

"Fine. You know where it's at?"

Silvery blue eyes rolled in exasperation as Rin reached over and grabbed his arm. In a flash, the pair were standing inside one of the rooms.

The room itself was empty, but the sound of running water could be heard and Jinpachi sighed in relief. 

Relief that was short lived when he turned to give reluctant thanks to Rin for his help. The boy was staring at the bathroom door with naked fear and worry on his face.

"What is it?"

For once there was no antagonism on the young face as their eyes met. "You can't feel it?" When he shook his head, Rin continued. "It's death. I feel death."

If anyone would know what death felt like, Jinpachi knew it would be Shion's reincarnation. The other moon scientist had been surrounded by nothing but death for years. He was probably more intimately familiar with it than anyone else on Earth.

"No!" The room was small, and it only took a quick stride to put him in front of the door. The psychic twisted at the knob, only to find it locked. "Issei! Issei, open the door!"

There was a displacement in the air and his companion disappeared, presumably into the bathroom. At the same time, the doorknob finally gave and Jinpachi fell through the opening.

The sight that met his eyes would haunt him for the rest of his life.

Rin, having not bothered to turn off the shower, sat in the stall drenched. In his arms, he clutched an apparently lifeless Issei. The empath's elegant arms hung limply outside the circle of the boy's grasp, revealing the long, jagged cuts from the elbows down to the wrists.

The inane thought crossed his mind that even in his suicide, Issei tried to be considerate of others, doing it in a place where the blood wouldn't' leave a mess.

"C-call an ambulance," Rin managed to ground out. Jinpachi just looked at him stupidly. 

_He's dead_, his mind whispered. _How can he be dead_?

A sudden pressure sent him sprawling backwards. "Call a fucking ambulance!"

It was only then that the blonde noticed the glowing aura that surrounded the pair and understood what Rin was doing. He was giving his own energy to try and revive their friend. But all the energy in the world wouldn't do them any good if Issei didn't receive real medical attention, preferably with a blood transfusion, soon.

Spurred on, he made the call and then returned to turn off the water and wait. His arms ached to snatch Issei away and hold him close, but he restrained himself, knowing that he couldn't do what Rin was doing. He couldn't give Issei that life-saving power.

_Please be okay_, he prayed frantically. _Please let him be okay. I can't lose him, not now_. 

He'd thought he'd known heartache when Alice had rejected him. When Mokuran had rejected Gyokuran.

He'd known nothing.

How had his best friend put it in the dream? Oh yeah.. Ripping out his heart and stomping on it. 

_Is this how you felt, Issei_? 

_I'm sorry... I'm so damned sorry_. 

_Sarjalim? Please don't take him away from me. I'm sorry I didn't take better care of him. I'm sorry I broke my promise to protect him. _

He was still praying and begging forgiveness when the paramedics arrived to take Issei away.

TBC  
I have promised Nonny, that is- aka_anonymous, that I will not end the overall story in any way that can be considered a cliffhanger. Either Issei will live and get his man, or he won't and he'll die... ^_^;;;


End file.
